The Confused Desi?

Original Publish Date: October 28, 2007

Coming back to university to do my Masters degree means many things. One of which is of course, meeting new people and making new friends. Since I am of Indian decent, it only seems natural that I hang around with the Desi crowd at UBC. Most of these people are ‘FOBs’, basically those who were born and raised in India and have come here to do their Masters/PhD degrees.

Over time, some of these ‘FOBs’ have become my very good friends. However, a topic that sometimes comes up in discussions is my lack of ‘CBCD’ness… that is, apparently because I am Canadian born, I am not confused enough. Every time anyone says this, I really do become confused. Why should I, or any other person born in this country who has roots in India be confused?

What is it that makes us confused? That we can’t speak our own language… no wait, most of us can speak at least one Indian language along with English. Maybe its religion… no wait, most of us have been accompanying our parents to the Mandir/Masjid/Gurdwara for years. Pop culture? But some of us like Bollywood movies too, and I can’t think of anyone who doesn’t like to Bhangra! Hmmn… let me think. Not knowing about Indian politics? Yeah, that must be it. We are confused because we don’t know that AIADMK stands for ‘All India Anna Dravida Munnetra Khazagam’. Of course I wonder about just how many North Indians actually know what AIADMK stands for…

There are definitely different types of Canadian born Indians living in this country. Perhaps due to upbringing, or due to personal preference, there are those who are proud of their heritage, and respect it (Indo Canadians), and those who do not (just Canadian). Either way, it’s a conscious decision, and nobody is confused about it.

During my last visit to India, I noticed a few things. One of which was that the country was becoming rapidly ‘westernized’. There are those who still want to maintain tradition, decorum, and everything else that makes India, ‘India’. But I wonder if the average urban Indian student these days knows more about Shakespeare or Kalidas? The economic theories of Adam Smith or Chanakya? If the average urban Indian student doesn’t know the things that are actually truly ‘Indian’ does that mean that he/she is confused as well? Overall, I think I experienced a 5000 year old civilization which is becoming rapidly overwhelmed, and whose younger generation is struggling with wanting to become ‘westernized’ and yet remain ‘Indian’ at the same time.

My point is that the line between the average urban Indian, and the average Indian born in Toronto is slowly becoming blurred. Why do FOBs and CBCDs tend not to interact with each other? Well in general I would say that each group feels the other is arrogant and exclusive. Hmmn… perhaps there is more in common than we thought.

That’s not to say there’s NO difference between being Indian born and Canadian born. There is no question that those of us who are born here have missed out on some of the benefits that must have come with growing up in India. We may never know what the ‘immigrant experience’ of packing up and moving to a foreign country is like. But on the other hand, those of us born here have had the benefit of growing up in, experiencing and balancing two different cultures. We are proud to be Canadian AND Indian. And I for one, am cool with that.